Friday, January 14, 2011


R.A.N.D.O.M.N.E.S.S. ???

I feel sorta left out in school. School has been sort of a nightmare to me. :( I just don't feel comfortable. It's likeee....i can't be myself there and yeah, the people around me sorta gives me the chills. I don't understand why? Why do i always get nervous in front of crowds or popular people in my form? Should i wear a mask to make me feel much much better? hiding behind it everyday? trying hard not to embarrass myself? I don't like that feeling. I feel like i'm an outsider. I guess i'm not ready to be a senior in school.

Hmmm...I just don't understand whats the difference between being popular in school and just being a normal student? Does popularity really mean alot to people nowadays? Oh wait! They do. For example: *People from my school* I'm not trying to say that being popular is a bad thing, but sometimes it makes other people feel bad about themselves and yeah, it does hurt. I'm not saying that the person hurting is me tho, but other people whom i've noticed in school too. The popular kids in school, well, we had this election thing and yeah, un-popular students just don't get the chance to get elected or voted. Hmmm...i guess the populars should give other people a chance, and not get so self-centered. Why? Why get so much attention for? I just don't understand whats so nice about being one of the popular ones. Being normal and who you are is whats AWESOME i tell you. :)

Well, a tip for the ones who are popular or wants to be one, please just be yourself and make others feel good about themselves too. Don't just stick to your own popular buddies, but also the ones around you. They are your buddies too you know. Get to know them and i can tell you that they won't hate you for being someone popular. Be popular around people you love and not for the sake of yourself. Nothing good is coming out from that anyway. Popular is just a word and it's not lasting, so why not make a change now. Start caring for people more and not for yourself. I can say for myself that i don't wanna be popular. Being normal is enough for me. :) Well, i don't know about you but this are just my random thoughts. Thanks for reading. :)


-writtenwithlove-larissa-

Friday, December 31, 2010

Happy New Year People! :) hehe, last year has been a blast but i'm sure this year will be as awesome as last years! :)

Anyway, having to be at my churchs watchnight service last night was pretty different from the others and special in a way. Having to move on from that year was a pretty hard thing to do but I guess the church really grew closer that year and yeah, the youths did too and also the senior citizens. :) I guess God really spoke to everyone of us in a very special way and that is love. "Gods cradle of love for a strong society?" I hope i got that right. haha, I'm trully amazed at what God did and has done for me throughout the whole year. He really showed me what love means and one of it is making sacrifices for the ones you love. For me, having to take the risk and setting aside whats best for God and not for myself is really something that i will always remember to do. God really comforts me and yeah, throughout the experience in having to do NOJ, i found out that God was always there for me, through my ups and downs and also when i'm trying to face my fears of having stage-fright. God has always been my handkerchief in times of need. Nothing can compare to the love God has shown me and blessed me with.

When i was at youth camp last year, i wished that it would be a total blast, and it did happen, but way way way better. :) and it did continue during caroling and the other days after that. I guess my highlight of the year was almost everything. hahaha. *sorry for being greedy here but Everyday seems to be the best day of my life* :) Without God, i will never have become the person i am today. Without him, i will have never been able to move on. Without him, it will always be me, myself and I. Looking back, i am thankful for everything he blessed me with. Good school, a home, my parents, family and friends, being a Christian, having to live in a good country where it is natural phenomena-free and also that we can also speak freely and the list goes on. Yeah, i will never have thought of all the wonderful things he has given me back then without getting close to him, but i'm glad that i did.

Mhmmm...having a special relationship with God and also having to spend time with him is a real blessing. Tho at times we think seeking God is hard, but actually it's not. He is always omni-present. I like sharing my problems with God and that i can hear him telling me that everything is gonna be okay. He is wonderfully made and i'm happy to be made in his image. :) You might think i'm being silly here, but everytime when i shed a tear, it rains. Well, most of the time, when i do, but when it does, i always think of it as God is crying because I am. In a way, it tells me that God feels my pain and that he understands how i feel and that he doesn't want me to cry no more because he will help me to move on. :)

God is a patient and loving God. This year, i feel the strong change in me. I have gotten closer to people, i learn to care and listen to others more, i learn to listen to him during worship sessions and in prayers, through the things around me, through people, through experiences, through non-christian songs and also my thoughts. People say i am an insider, but when at times, i do feel like an outsider too because sometimes i don't fit in. But things have changed now and yeah, God has helped me and showed me that i am part of his life and in others too.

Thank you God for that very special year! This year, i hope and pray that i will become even more and more closer to you God and that i will be able to find time to spend time with you eventho i may be busy studying for SPM. Thank you God for everything. Amen. :)

Wednesday, December 15, 2010


I MISS YOU~!

Love is being stupid together

"A part of you has grown in me. And so you see, it's you and me together forever and never apart, maybe in distance, but never in heart."

"Falling in love with someone isn't always going to be easy... Anger... tears... laughter.. It's when you want to be together despite it all. That's when you truly love another. I'm sure of it."

"A year, ten years from now, I'll remember this; not why, only that we were here like this, together."

“Two lives, two hearts joined together in friendship united forever in love.”

“Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.”

But...

Time is flying, never to return.


For those who are hurting, for those who are sick and for those whom i love, I give you all HUGGGSSS and know that God is there for you.

RANDOM-NESSS!

Father God, teach me how to love others just the way you do. Help me to accept them for who they are. Father God, what can i do to keep them from hurting? From being hurt by others and for hurting themself. What can i do to reach out to them? Help me also to love and accept myself for who i am before loving others Father God. I pray for those who are hurting, help them to remember you and know that you are with them God, at all times. Help them to share their deepest thoughts with you and know that everything is gonna be alright. Help me to be their handkerchief in times of need too Father God, just as how you are mine when i shed a tear or is feeling useless at times. Thank you for all the times you are with me, in times of need or not, you are always there. Thank you for changing my life and for who I am today. I pray that i can help make a change in other peoples life too Father God.

-writtenwithlove-larissa :)
Just my thoughts.

There are just somethings that people don't know about me. I guess i can never be a person who is really open at everything. At times, i just don't understand what guys/girls are thinking. I don't blame the person who tells me something i might not want to hear and after that asks me if i'm jealous or not, but i blame myself because i don't really know what i want. I already moved on but i guess some people might still think that i'm still the same. Am i just hurting myself? I don't know. Dear God, i pray that you will help me to be a patient person. Help me to focus on you, and not the past. I believe that you have changed me and there's no way i am going back to my old self. Help me to move forward and remember that you are my handkerchief in times of need.

~writtenwithlove-larissa :)